Keeping the Balance

What is it
That we must learn
To embrace
In the darkness?
Fear responds:
"I've made you
So much stronger."
Self-judgement chimes in:
" And I keep you
On track..."
They 
Claim a place,
Inherit and
Inhabit flesh.
It is part of
Keeping the balance.
It is how we spin
In and out
Of control
Simultaneously.
It is how we are
Both living and dying
In these
Flickering moments.
On this borrowed time,
We are meant
To learn
Life is an initiation
In the art
Of letting go.
And, perhaps I've
Spent too many years
Cataloging the things
I've lost and will lose?
Agonizingly re-examining
How and why they were
Or will be
Taken from me.
Maybe I haven't
Spent enough time
Watching, smelling, and learning
From the marigolds as they
Creep across the yard,
Ripe, spicy, and
Impossibly laden
With the perfume
Of death. 
What an
Improbable blessing
To bloom and thrive
Beneath the burden
Of this sickly sweet stench;
To live under
This mottled blue sky.
But, we are all capable,
In life and in death,
Of things
Which we've been
Unable to fully see.
Some times we hear
The echo,
We run our fingers
Along the edges,
Tracing the seams.
And, only after we notice
The cracks in the pavement,
Do we realize:
Things that seem
Fixed and silent
Are rippling,
Quivering, and
Howling
In the night.